Lessons Thirty through Thirty-five

I'm doing extra lessons today because it's been a while since I've actually posted a lessons entry - even though they're supposed to be every Friday.
There are three more lessons left after this!

Lesson Thirty
Contrition
To be completely honest, I think the world needs more of this.  At least people should read this chapter of the catechism; it explains how to be truly sorry for something you've done wrong.  The chapter itself is writing up to the next chapter concerning confession, but could be taken out of the book and made a life lesson.
The whole point is to be very, truly sorry for the wrongs you've done (sins you've committed) before you confess them.  You wouldn't make an apology to someone without meaning every word, would you?

Lesson Thirty-one
Confession
A complete confession is humble, has no lies, and no intentional omissions.  It is your duty to be honest with yourself and your confessor.  Perhaps the former is the most difficult.

Lesson Thirty-two
How to Make a Good Confession
This chapter details how to make a good confession.  You should prepare by thinking of all the sins you've committed between confessions.  I try not to leave anything out, no matter how dumb it might be; if I feel bad for it, I should confess it.

Lesson Thirty-three
Temporal Punishment and Indulgences
435. What is an indulgence?  An indulgence is the remission granted by the Church of the temporal punishment due to sins already forgiven
 436.  How many kinds of indulgences are there?  There are two kinds of indulgences, plenary and partial.
Plenary is full remission and partial is, well, partial.
You cannot gain an indulgence for another living person, but you can gain an indulgence for a soul in purgatory.
I'm not sure how I feel about indulgences.  They seem kind of selfish to me, but I'm not sure I fully understand them.  The way I see it, you should be the best possible person you could ever be without seeking reward.  But I could be understanding the premise incorrectly.

Lesson Thirty-four
Anointing of the Sick and Holy Orders
This lesson explains why the sick should be anointed and touches on Holy Orders at the end. 

Lesson Thirty-five
Matrimony
467.  What should Catholics do to prepare for a holy and happy marriage?  To prepare for a holy and happy marriage Catholics should:

• first, pray that God may direct their choice;
• second, seek the advice of their parents and confessors;
• third, practice the virtues, especially chastity;
• fourth, frequently receive the sacraments of penance and Holy Eucharist

This chapter also explains some of the rules regarding matrimony and briefly touches on why divorce is invalid in the eyes of the church.
"What therefore God has joined together, let no man put asunder."

~~~

I feel like this entry was kind of weak, but I can't think of anything more to say for these.  I guess I'm just not having a verbose day.
And that, ladies and gentleman, was an excuse to use the word "verbose."

Lessons Twenty-seven, Twenty-eight, Twenty-nine

Lesson Twenty-seven
The Sacrifice of the Mass
361.  What are the purposes for which the Mass is offered?  The purposes for which the Mass is offered are:

• first, to adore God as our Creator and Lord;
• second, to thank God for his many favors;
• third, to ask God to bestow His blessings to all men;
• fourth, to satisfy the justice of God for the sins committed against Him.

Lesson Twenty-eight
Holy Communion
To receive Holy Communion worthily you must be free of mortal sin, have the right intentions, and have fasted for at least an hour prior.  There are dispensations for the fasting bit that can be given by priests in special cases.

Lesson Twenty-nine
Penance
To receive Penance worthily there are steps, the basic progression being as follows;

1. Examination of conscience
2. Being truly sorry for the sin(s)
3. Intending firmly to not repeat the sin(s)
4. Confession
5. Willingness to complete the penance given.

~~~

I'm very sorry for my deadness last week.  I've been absorbed [read stressed] with wedding stuff in addition to not feeling well.

Some really weird stuff has been going on, but I'm not going to get into it here.  All I'm going to say is that I'm really confused, and it probably could have had better timing, i.e. after the wedding, rather than before.  I don't exactly need another thing to worry over.

We'll find out Saturday morning what's going on I think.  Or we won't and I'll be left to puzzle over yet another thing.

Lessons Twenty-one, Twenty-two, and Twenty-three

I have a lesson of my own today.
I learned something this week.  Or, more accurately, relearned as I tend to forget this lesson on occasion.  I learned that I should absolutely not write when I'm upset.  It's a very tempting thing to do because it feels like it's satisfying, but it's a trick (it's a trap!).  It's not satisfying later, when I wake up the next day, or even a few hours after posting.  I feel childish and rather silly more often than not, for giving in to the temptation.  Then I reprimand myself for having posted it.  On Facebook, I simply delete the update (unless there are comments), though I have improved at not posting things in the first place.  Here, there will be no deleting.  I haven't really written when I've been angry; I generally calm myself down before I begin a post, but I have not followed this rule with comments.  For shame.  I know better.

The next lesson is this:
The amazing thing about text is it can be interpreted however the reader wants to interpret it.  Regardless of the writer's intent.  This is what I disliked most about literature class in school; interpretation of an author's work.  Particularly poetry.  For example, in my college lit class we interpreted the following poem:

This Is Just To Say
by William Carlos Williams

I have eaten
the plums
that were in
the icebox

and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast

Forgive me
they were delicious
so sweet
and so cold

And the first thing someone said about it was that it was about sex.  Specifically about a man taking a woman's virginity.  Having experience with the sentiment of regret on that subject I understood how my classmate had interpreted the poem in that way; I could have myself, had my experience been more recent.  The correct interpretation, according to the teacher, was that it was a note posted on the fridge by a lover saying exactly what they had done: eaten the plums in the icebox.
Regardless of interpretation, this is one of my favorite poems.

At any rate, on to the lessons!

Lesson Twenty-one
The Commandments of the Church; The First and Second Commandments
281.  Which are the chief commandments, or laws, of the Church?  The chief commandments, or laws, of the church are these six:

1. To assist at mass on all Sundays and holydays of obligation.
2. To fast and to abstain on the days appointed.
3. To confess our sins at least once a year.
4. To receive Holy Communion during the Easter time.
5. To contribute to the support of the Church.
6. To observe the laws of the Church concerning marriage.

283.  Which are the holydays of obligation in the United States?  The holydays of obligation in the United States are these six:

1. Christmas Day (December 25)
2. Solemnity of Mary, Mother of God (January 1)
3. Ascension Thursday (40 days after Easter)
4. The Assumption (August 15)
5. All Saints' Day (November 1)
6. The Immaculate Conception (December 8)

The first and second commandments of the church are easy for me right now.  Mass is a joy to attend, and I wish there was a parish somewhere that celebrated mass in the evening so that I could attend daily mass.  Getting up at 5:30 in the morning and going straight to work is not very conducive to attending daily mass, as most of the mass times in my area are around 6:00 a.m..  That's probably the only thing I miss about my 2:00 p.m. to 8:00 p.m. schedule.
The second (fasting) is something I did before I was acquainted with the Church.  Every so often I would pick a day to fast, only consuming liquids the entire day (almost, I never quite made it to bed time).  So giving up meat on Fridays, or fasting during lent is not exactly a new concept to me, and I actually enjoy doing it.  During lent I try to give up something challenging - last year was caffeine (I work at a coffee shop) and sugar - and I will put in my best effort to abstain from whatever it is until lent is over.  This means no 'cheating' by making exceptions of Sundays and feast days.
My fiance calls me his little viking because of this and my unwillingness to take painkillers right away.  This is how I've always done lent, though; nothing of what I gave up until lent has officially ended.  That is not to say that I apply this to others.  I only expect it of myself; however you do lent is okay with me.

Funny story:  As I was reading the holydays of obligation I thought, "crap! I missed the Solemnity of Mary, Mother of God this year.  That's a terrible way to start off 2012!"  But then, looking at the calendar, I realized that January 1st was on a Sunday.  It was like the moment you realize you're missing your credit/debit card, only to find that you've put it in the wrong place in your wallet.

Lesson Twenty-two
The Third, Fourth, Fifth, and Sixth Commandments of the Church

The third commandment of the Church is regarding confession.  Once a year seems pretty lenient to me, though.  Shouldn't you confess your sins weekly, or at the very least monthly?  I used to be afraid of confession, but now (having done it) I feel it is necessary to my spiritual well-being.  It gives me points of improvement, as it were.  I can measure my own progress in being a good person week by week judging by what I have to confess.
The fourth (communion) is another that seems like it should be more frequent.  It can be a double edged sword, however.  The churches (that I think have lost sight of things a little) that provide no confessional other than by appointment are offering their members the opportunity to commit sacrilege.  Granted, this statement assumes a lot about the parishioners, and I don't think the assumption is generally true for those that attend these churches; I'm just saying that the opportunity is more readily available for sacrilege to be committed out of ignorance more than anything else.  But then, if you commit it out of ignorance, does the sacrilege still apply?  I'll have to ask Father.  Speaking of Father, he said (on a couple occasions) that a sign of a healthy parish is long confession lines, and short communion lines.  I tend to agree, as no one is without sin.
The fifth is self-explanatory, although it makes me think of the guy who argued Catholicism was polytheistic.  He also claimed that if you don't drop money in the collection plate every Sunday, you will be looked down upon, and generally made a pariah in the church.  I didn't start putting money into the collection plate every Sunday until very recently.  To the best of my knowledge, no one judged me for it, and I certainly wasn't shunned.
The sixth is also pretty self-explanatory.  I think.

Lesson Twenty-three
The Sacraments
305.  How many sacraments are there?  There are seven sacraments:  Baptism, Confirmation, Holy Eucharist, Penance, Anointing the Sick, Holy Orders, and Matrimony.

This lesson explains the special graces given by each sacrament and what those graces and sacraments help you achieve.  It also touches a little on mortal sin, explaining that if you miss mass on Sundays or holydays you've committed a mortal sin, etc.  Basically if you violate the sacraments, you've committed a mortal sin.
Receiving communion in a state of mortal sin is an example of sacrilege.  Which is what I was referring to earlier.

~~~

As a footnote: I am a newb when it comes to being Catholic: there is still much for me to learn.  Here is where I will share my learning experience with you.  I'm not trying to teach you anything.  At best, I'd like for this blog to provide references, which is why I structure the lesson entries the way I do.  I cannot stress enough that I am not telling anyone they should change.  I'm relating the story of my own change.

...and it was Good

Let me first say thank you to everyone who has been visiting.  I very much appreciate it.

~~~

I was baptized and confirmed this past Saturday (the fourteenth of January) and received first communion Sunday.  It was quite an experience.

Pictured: a kneeler.

Baptism was interesting; I had only once witnessed a Catholic baptism and it was for an infant.  An adult baptism is much different.  We started outside of the church; the priest stood in front of a kneeler (I'm not sure of the proper name for it) and I behind with my Godparents on each side of me.  There were a lot of people there, so I focused mainly on the book Father was reading from to keep from being nervous.
The prayers were beautiful in both English and Latin, and the ritual of the ceremony was moving for me.  Towards the end of our time outside I knelt three times and recited the Our Father, being signed after each prayer by my Godparents and by Father.  The signing was intimate in that I could feel the energy from each who signed me.  My Godfather was reserved, kind of serious energy, not without excitement; my Godmother radiated warmth and love; and Father was full of solemn anticipation, not without joy.  Feeling each of their energies was the most moving part of our time outside.
After some prayers in Latin we moved into the entrance with the Apostle's Creed.  I was anointed with oil and the second the oil touched my skin I felt a mixture of emotions: joy, relief, determination.  My spirit was being rejuvenated, as if waking from a restful sleep.  More prayers and we moved into the sanctuary to the baptismal.  I bent over and water was poured across my forehead.  When I straightened I was given a lit candle and the ceremony was complete.
My baptism was conditional because I couldn't remember if water had been used when I was baptized the first time, so Father and I headed to confession.
Confession was not nearly as scary as I had thought it would be.  I effectively psyched myself out for it because I had absolutely no idea what to expect, but the whole experience was rather pleasant.
Confirmation was shorter than the baptism, but no less potent.  My sponsor stood behind me with her hand on my right shoulder and we did the responses together (she lead me, mostly, being more experienced with it than I).  When I stood from the kneeler in the sanctuary I very nearly started crying; I have never felt more at peace than I did in that moment.  I felt, again, like I was home after a very long journey in a foreign land.
Everyone had congratulations for me, but I was concentrating so hard on not actually crying that they sort of blurred together.  I have a feeling that my wedding might resemble that.

My baptismal name is Catherine, after the patron saint of art.
My confirmation name is Cecilia, after the patron saint of music.

Communion brought more peace, although it wasn't what I was expecting.  Communion had always been bread and grape juice/wine at the U.C.C. church I had gone to.  I knew that Catholic communion was different in that it was just a wafer, but for some reason I had been expecting something bigger.
At any rate, it was a wonderful experience.  I look forward to sharing in it every Sunday.

Confitērī

My God, I am sorry for my sins with all my heart. In choosing to do wrong and failing to do good, I have sinned against You, whom I should love above all things. I firmly plan, with Your help, to do penance, to sin no more, and to avoid whatever leads me to sin. Our Savior Jesus Christ suffered and died for us. In His name, my God, have mercy. Amen

con·fess

VERB 

1. To disclose (something damaging or inconvenient to oneself); admit.
   1. To make known (one's sins) to God or to a priest.
   2. To hear the confession of (a penitent).
2. To acknowledge belief or faith in; profess.

 ~~~

I'll be baptized soon and then comes confession: the one thing I scoffed at most before having a real look at the faith.  I called it voyeuristic once if I'm remembering correctly.

Now it looms ahead of me, intimidating.
There's something about assessing your whole life, finding everything you did wrong, and telling someone - whom you don't know very well - about all of it.  It's terrifying, but not for the reasons you'd expect.
Having come to this juncture in my young-adult life without the Catholic Church, I've done plenty of things that are less than pleasant to admit.  These things, while not terrible, are things that I will probably have problems with saying. Aloud. To my parish priest.  It's nerve-racking for the simple reason that I fear judgement of others.  Particularly others whom I respect and look up to.  In this situation the fear is perhaps unfounded, but it sits at the back of my mind poking me, with an overly smug look on it's ugly face.  It's hard to ignore sometimes.
There is a lesson in the Catechism that eased my apprehension a little when we went over it in class, but it seems that was temporary.

I suppose the largest factor in it is the unknown: I've never done this before.  I can't help but wonder what it'll be like, how awkward it will be, what I'm supposed to say.
Wait, what am I supposed to say?
I didn't know, so I googled it (using Bing now, I like it better).  This is what I came up with (it's a .pdf file, fair warning).  I have that saved in my bookmarks so I can come back to it.
I'll be memorizing the Act of Contrition, but I'm terrible at memorizing things, so who knows if I'll remember it when I actually need to use it.  Eventually it will stick in my mind, though, so I'm not terribly worried.

Then comes the part where I have to tell someone who is not my significant other everything I've done wrong.  Well, not every single, little thing, but a lot of things.  Before I got here I held the belief that my sins were between God and I.  Why can't God just forgive them if I apologize directly?
I understand now that just looking up to the heavens and whispering "I'm sorry" (or any form of those words) is not enough.  To go and tell your greatest faults to a priest is a kind of penance in it's own way.  Not only that, but it is an action that shows exactly how committed to being penitent you really are.  By just saying "I'm sorry" to God yourself, you're not proving you really care that your actions could hurt your relationship with Him.  You need that extra step.  The apology is more genuine this way.
It also gives you a chance to really reflect on what changes you need to make.

In all, confession is a beautiful act and should be done on a regular basis.
That doesn't change the fact that it's hard.

Nor does it change the fact that I'm scared of it.